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It's Christmas Eve in New York, and Ryan's down on his luck. He lost his well-paying job at Lehman Brothers, he's sparring with his fiancée Jennifer, and his ill-advised attempt at delivering cocaine resulted in disaster; he returned without the drugs, without payment, and with a black eye. He's afraid to meet the drug kingpin, Benbella; but he's even more afraid to run, so he arrives at the rendezvous with empty pockets. Benbella's nowhere to be found. Instead, Ryan encounters a Greek chorus of drunken Santas, an enigmatic snowman, a beautiful barmaid, a Tony Kushner enthusiast, a post-9/11 paranoiac, and a bespectacled financial analyst who tells him the story of "the standard man."