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For our friend Ellis, there's nothing more harrowing that getting your hair cut. Having to stare at your uncomfortable soggy headed self in the mirror whilst some fake-smiled, fake-nailed stranger frantically snips their way around your fleshy lugholes is bad enough, but what he hates most is the obnoxious 'Small Talk'. But maybe there's a way he can b-line this idle chit-chat, a way to avoid the cheery, mundane questions about where he's going on his holidays, a way to dodge the tedious discussion of today's weather, a way to...well, potentially offend a whole lot of people. But if it works...it will SO be worth it.